I started as a Moonkin, I’m leaving as one too.

There was a time when my thoughts were consumed with nothing but Azeroth. When I was afraid to go outside because I thought I would have to run from mobs in real life.
I have killed so many dragons, monsters and rats. I have healed my friends, my enemies. I have PVP, had server firsts, done arena, laughed, cried, created many alts. I have beat the fucking game. Over the past ten years I have done everything the World of Warcraft has to offer and now its time to make like a shitty ret pally at 10% health and bubble hearth out of here.
Its not a big deal, I mean it was a couple days ago when I did it. I cried. Honestly cried. Im getting a bit misty eyed talking about it right now too.
I was talking to a friend in game who has the same name as the person I first fell in love with in game. They both have dark brown hair and dark brown eyes and voices that make me melt into a puddle. It felt like the circle was closed properly. I ported to Moonglade, climbed up on a rock and waved. I logged out and uninstalled all my Blizzard games.
WoW was there for me when I was in a very dark place. I had a family in game. As the years went on, that family started moving on, it just took me this long to finally realize I need to as well. I still have my friends, they just don’t only exist inside Azeroth.
I love the people of the community. Even the ones I don’t like because everyone needs love. Cept that one guy. You know who I’m talking about. ;)
Tl:DR WoW days are done. No big deal. Thanks for all the fish.


People complain. Life is hard. Each person’s path is different than someone else. When I complain about something, I am not asking for attention. I am not asking for help or answers or a fix. I just want to vent and I want someone to listen and really hear me. Not jump into fix mode and save me from whatever it is I’m annoyed with.
Just shut the fuck up and listen. Get crazy with me that I want to set fire to my house because there is a spider. Or I want to do a naked protest at Hulu headquarters because they play too many commercials. I don’t need reality when I’m bitching, I need to laugh, especially at myself.
What i don’t need is an answer, a solution, or someone to save me. Commiserate with me.
I don’t need someone to tell me to ‘look on the bright side’ or that I ‘shouldn’t feel a certain way’ or tell me about the starving children in Africa. When you use your own  pain to one up someone else pain, that’s not helpful. Don’t be a one upper. Listen.
People want their pain, their emotions to be validated. Telling someone they shouldn’t feel a certain way is invalidating what they are feeling and often cases makes them defensive. A person’s emotional response to a situation should be acknowledged for what it is. An emotional response. Tend to that emotion, that person while they are feeling the way they do. Let them feel it until they don’t need to any more. Stand by, be a friend, make them laugh. Don’t don’t tell them they shouldn’t feel the way they do.



This Time…

The love affair is over, done tonight
like the last cigarette that I smoke as I write.

people gather ’round me, not to pay homage to the love I had for you
just to get air
like I have
so submerged in you
for so long

I’ve finally break from your sea to take my first breath
I am no longer yours
Your muse, nor have I been for many moons.

It has taken me as long as I have held my breath for you

to realize you will never love me like I love you.

maybe I’ll change my mind like I always do
but something is telling me, this time its true.

A Wild Noelove Appears

This post is neither long nor dramatic. Ok maybe a little long.


I took a break from social media. *confetti*

I didn’t want to be one of those people who writes a long ass post about why they are taking a break from social media. LOOK AT ME. VALIDATE MY DECISION. TELL ME YOU’RE GOING TO MISS ME. blah blah blah. That’s not me. I needed a break so I took one. You people are sweet and wonderful for being concerned about me. I discovered who cares for me in a very real way during this break. Its been nice to see. Crap, I totally did reverse psychology on y’all?

Gee Noel, what have you been doing?

Getting into a routine. Completed boot camp again and I’ve been hitting three yoga classes a week. I can finally do a plank. I feel really strong. I’ve been taking care of the small humans and El Jeffe, decluttering my house and giving things away on Freecycle/Craiglist. We got a new flat screen TV, set up ChromeCast on both TVs and set up Plex too. WHICH IS FUCKING BALLER. Did a catering gig. I’ve been eating semi-paleo, but I have slipped up and had pizza (OM NOM NOM), totally worth it. I weigh less now than I did at Blizzcon and it shows.

Its rained like crazy for 3 days, then we got tons of sun again, the Toyota people fixed the van and I found a dentist that I actually like. Signed Isaiah up for indoor soccer and Stella up for T-ball at the YMCA for spring, then signed all the kids up for 6 weeks of summer camp at the YMCA, went on a job interview that lasted all of 60 seconds (didn’t get it), started my new website, youtube channel and twitter handle for the restaurant contest. More deets on that when everything is ready to launch. (BIG. TIME. STUFFS)

Yes I’ve been playing a LOT of WoW. My alliance guild <Vandalized> is pretty cool. I’ve been running rated BGs with them. I’m currently relevant in PVP. I’ve been doing arena with a guy who makes me feel like the most amazing healer ever. We run a Hunter/Druid combo, we also run a two druid combo. He’s really nice, doesn’t yell at me during matches, and he’s funny as hell. Horde side, well, a certain guild is coming back this summer and I’ve been trying to gear up not only the Priest, but a fresh 90 Druid to WPVP with them.

I’m good. I do miss y’all a lot. I’ll be around and hopefully not as absorbed with social media as before. (I really typed that with a straight face. Really a straight face as I’m checking twitter to look at you people. OH HI!)

this was my favorite journal
Written by

i don’t listen to you for weeks

and then you invade my brain in a dream and when I need you most your music your sound, come around the way you put your hand on my thigh when I’m driving when my lover is yelling at me from back seat there you are with untitled music and I push play yet i […]

December 6, 2013 0
Written by

I once had a man look across the table from me friends around us. my actual tie next to me He focussed my eyes, hard and he said ‘if heaven had a height, you would be that tall’. I sucked my breath in hard because I was already in love with him with wonder and […]

August 24, 2013 0
Page 1 of 80123456»102030...Last »
This is about me, not about you.